Toddlers. Should I mention anything else? The meaning of the word can be taken in a variety of different directions.
Toddlers are prone to irrational behavior, a short fuse, and can even be cruel at times.
They have the ability to put a mother’s patience to the ultimate test. Then there are other situations in which they are as palatable as apple pie.
These teeny-tiny humans are caught in a phase where they are trying to become independent yet at the same time requiring you each and every minute of the day.
Here are five ways to remain calm and how to not lose patience with a toddler!
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The next thing you know, your child is throwing a full-blown temper tantrum and punching you.
The very next second, your sweet little darling dozed off while clinging to you and falling asleep in your arms.
Because I am the mother of a toddler, I completely understand what you are going through.
At random intervals, fleeting doubts arise regarding the wisdom of my choice to start a family.
Then, though, my little toddler looks at me with those stunning blue eyes, and an instant wave of warmth washes over me.
Because I wouldn’t let him throw himself off the couch face first, he had a temper tantrum that lasted for an entire hour, but I soon forget all about it.
Oh, the ecstasies of being a mother!
We’ve all been in that situation. Every mother has been there, whether her child is still in the infant stage or is already far into their teenage years.
And would you believe it?
Every mother who came before you has emerged from this experience unscathed.
Toddlers have the ability to push you to your ultimate limit. Activating every hidden button deep within you that you weren’t even aware existed.
It can be challenging to parent a child when they are still in their toddler years.
Especially for you, mother. Have no dread! You only require a large quantity. And by a great deal of patience, I do mean.
The ability to accept or suffer delay and/or hardship without becoming angry or agitated is what we mean when we talk about patience.
When dealing with children, maintaining patience can be an exceedingly challenging task at times.
Especially if you are a parent who stays at home with your children.
You are never given the chance to get out of the house and refresh your batteries.
At some point, something will have to give, and in most cases, it will be your patience.
I have learnt techniques to manage with my one-year-old son’s everyday tantrums, newfound independence, and silly antics in order to maintain my sanity while dealing with him.
My experience with my toddler helped me develop tolerance at an early age.
How To Not Lose Patience With A Toddler
1. Stop Yelling
In our lives, each of us has come across at least one mother who seems to spend her entire day yelling at her children.
Her initial response, regardless of what they do, is to start screaming at them.
Believe me when I say that there are times when I am that yelling mother.
There are certain days that are horrible because I have to cope with one too many incidents of throwing up and outbursts that are identical to the scene in The Exorcist.
My son has completely exhausted my capacity for patience at this moment. I raise my voice to make my argument through. However, nothing has changed.
Even now, he continues to throw temper tantrums.
This is due to the fact that yelling is not an effective method of communicating.
The only thing I’ve been able to accomplish is to show him my wrath. It’s possible that this will make him feel upset and confused.
A child may, with enough exposure to it, develop to believe that yelling is an acceptable and even natural part of everyday life.
When I yell at my son, I am modeling for him that it is acceptable to feel rage at the insignificant setbacks that occur in life.
That is not a healthy way to go about life. You can demonstrate to your child the appropriate way to respond to a challenging circumstance by restraining yourself from exhibiting anger and yelling at them.
What other options do you have besides yelling at them?
Speak in a calm voice. It is not necessary to scream or yell at a child in order to get your point across to him or her. Children are smart. They pick up information quite quickly.
If you want to get your argument through, consider approaching things from their perspective.
Face your child and explain to him or her directly why the behavior is unacceptable.
Always remember to keep a level head and speak in a controlled manner.
Your child will be more at ease when you can keep your voice under control and remain cool.
Related: Help! My Kid Won’t Sleep! 5 Bedtime Tips For A Better Night’s Sleep
2. Think About What Your Child Did Right Today
Imagine that your kid has just finished creating his latest masterpiece on the wall by using all of the paint from his set.
Although this is not appropriate conduct on the side of your child, it is important to remember all of the wonderful things your child did before this minor event.
Did he manage to wash his teeth without having a temper tantrum?
Is his room tidy because he took the initiative to pick up his toys instead of waiting to be asked?
Did he take a fantastic nap?
You get where I’m going with this, don’t you? Consider the different ways that you might offer your child praise.
I can assure you that none of your children are completely depraved at all times.
They must have had some rest at some time, right? Just kidding.
Children are quick students who are already highly intelligent but are still searching for their place in this world.
Instead of being angry when you discover your youngster has been drawing on the walls, try to remain calm.
Take a minute to compose yourself before telling your child in a firm voice that it is never acceptable to paint on the walls.
After that, you should praise your youngster. Share with him or her something positive about your day together.
You can always find something positive to say about your child, even though they may have given you a headache due to the additional hours of cleaning time they led you to have to put in.
Not only does positive reinforcement serve to foster positive conduct but thinking about the positives helps you focus on anything other than your fleeting anger.
3. Be Honest
My child is aware of the signs that his mother is becoming a little aggravated.
The life of a mother who chooses to stay at home is not an easy one. There are no breaks provided for you.
You do not have the luxury of being able to leave the house, hop in the car (without the kids), and go to the spa in order to relax.
When my child naps for a sufficient amount of time, I count it as a blessing. Those occasions are typically the only breaks I receive from my role as a mother.
I finally snapped during a particularly trying day spent with my son because I had reached my limit of tolerance.
You know that point where you’re on the edge of breaking down and ugly crying or yelling at the top of your lungs?
I’m pretty sure that each and every mother has been there at least once.
At the very least, I certainly hope that I’m not the only one.
At this time, my tolerance is completely shot, so I gain my son’s attention, look into his eyes, and tell him in a forceful voice, “Mommy is losing her patience.” Or other times I’ll say, “You are making mommy very angry.”
I am aware of how cruel it may appear. That’s exactly how it is, but I’ve always believed it’s important to be open and honest with my son.
After I’ve been truthful with him, three things will occur.
First, I want to say that being able to tell him how I feel has the effect of removing a burden from my shoulders.
Second, my son is aware that our relationship is struggling and that things are not going well between us.
Third… when I tell him that I’m losing my patience, he hugs me and tells me that he understands.
Now, obviously, not every child will behave in this manner.
However, an unseen relationship exists between mothers and their offspring. The warm embrace he gives you is his way of saying sorry.
He can tell by looking at me that I’m angry. His embrace serves as a conciliatory gesture between the two of us.
Because we still love each other more than anything else, it indicates to me that everything will be okay no matter what happens.
If you are honest with your children, they will have a chance to prepare themselves before you start to yell or curl up in a ball and cry (depending on the day).
Your children will be able to see the real you when you are honest with them. Every mother has her flaws.
Every mother eventually reaches her limit and snaps.
Related Articles: What To Do When You Feel You Might “Lose It” On Your Kids
The Lies I Told My Pre-Parenting Self
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4. Put Yourself In Your Child’s Shoes
As we grow older, most of us are prone to losing the innocence we had as children.
The events that occur in our life are fraught with obligations. Our perspective is that of an adult looking at the situation.
Adult perspectives are the only ones through which we can comprehend and view any given circumstance. Children have a very unique perspective on the world.
Put yourself in your child’s position the next time your toddler throws a fit and try to understand what he or she is going through.
-What is the source of this temper tantrum?
-Imagine that you are a little human. How would you react in the same situation?
My family and I went to a choir concert not too long ago. It began around 7 o’clock in the evening, which is typically my son’s time to go to bed.
We didn’t even make it through the first song together, my son and I.
While he is sobbing uncontrollably in the foyer, I am running through in my thoughts the various things that have disturbed him.
To a large extent, I’m trying to put myself in his position.
My son is staying up well beyond his bedtime to attend a concert with a large number of people he does not know.
In addition to being anxious about new people, he is unable to run, walk around, or play when he wants to.
When dealing with my son in this particular circumstance, trying to see things from his point of view helped me maintain my patience.
It is challenging for any mother to navigate the social expectations that come with taking care of a toddler in a public setting.
When situations like this arise, it is essential to consider the emotions that your child is experiencing in addition to your own feelings as an adult.
When dealing with a toddler, it can be helpful to examine situations from the perspective of your child so that you can prevent potentially challenging scenarios in the near future.
5. Teach Patience
Children typically lack tolerance in most situations. When a toddler is hungry, they feel their hunger in the present moment.
There is no need to wait at all.
Either you as a mother figure out how to get on a regular schedule and start meal prepping, or you run the risk of your child having a full-blown tantrum. It is not in our nature to be patient.
Children need to develop their ability to wait patiently. Most of the time, they pick up valuable life lessons from the people who are closest to them.
You, as a mother, will be better able to exercise patience if you teach your child the value of being patient and how to control their wrath.
Your toddler might learn that patience is a virtue from experiences that occur in their everyday lives.
Don’t give in to your child’s demand for instant satisfaction all the time.
When your kid begs for anything, you should tell them they have to be patient and wait for it.
There are some things that cannot be delivered to them straight away.
Make your time spent reading into a lesson about being patient.
A toddler will read and turn the pages of a longer book in order to get to the end of the story if they read it.
As the child becomes older, gradually lengthen the amount of time spent listening to stories.
Instill in your youngster the value of sharing. Your child can learn patience via sharing by doing something as simple as letting them take turns playing with an item they both enjoy.
When it comes to sharing, a child needs to have a lot of patience.
A child might practice taking turns as a way to further explore the concept of patience.
Try splitting up your time. For instance, you could set a timer for fifteen minutes.
When the timer goes off, your child will have to give the toy to one of his or her siblings to play with.
Because 15 minutes is a long time for a child to wait to have a toy returned, the notion of patience is gradually taught to them over time.
Final Thoughts
It can be challenging to exercise patience when dealing with toddlers. Every day is unique in its own way.
There are simply days that are worse than others. Keep in mind that you should not react in anger even on the worst days, when your toddler pushes you to the very edge of your patience.
The feeling of anger only makes the situation even more difficult.
You don’t want yelling to be an acceptable style of communication, even if it can be difficult to refrain from raising your voice at times when you want to get your point through.
The tension that exists between you and your toddler can be eased by maintaining a calm voice.
Being a parent is all about having the strength to remain calm despite the chaos that surrounds you.
Find the good things that your child has done today and write them down (before the chaos).
There is a good chance that your toddler has impressed you with a million and one little things today that have gone undetected. Applaud the greatness that your child possesses.
When everything else fails, be honest. Warn your child that mommy is not feeling well and is about to go crazy because she is about to lose her mind.
When dealing with youngsters, honesty goes a very long way.
Your child will see that you are a real person with real imperfections, such as a lack of patience, as a result of this.
But try not to worry about it because there will be times when your child will lack patience just as much as you do.
Because of this, it is essential to try to understand the world from the perspective of your toddler.
The ability to look at a problematic circumstance from a different angle ultimately results in a more favorable outcome.
Keep in mind that you are the one who controls your feelings. Not your toddler.
You are the one who determines how the rest of the day will go, even if your toddler is testing your patience.
Instead of reacting in anger, focus on teaching your child patience through the various experiences that they will encounter throughout their life.
The more patience you show toward your child, the more patience your child will learn.
So go and follow these five tips for how to not lose your patience with a toddler!
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