When you become a mother, there are many sacrifices you make.
Motherhood is all about putting your children’s needs first and yours second.
While I expected a child to change my life forever…
I’m still astounded by the sacrifices mother’s everywhere made throughout the generations.
Since I became a mother there are six major sacrifices I’ve made for my child’s happiness.
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I really took my privacy for granted before I had my son. All the alone time I had before he arrived was extremely under appreciated.
In motherhood, there is no “me time” moments. Bathroom trips and showering are no longer a party of one. In my house, bathroom alone time behind a closed door is extinct.
Every time I go to the bathroom with the door closed, I don’t get a moments peace.
Instead I’m met with a fury of tiny fists banging on the door with an endless wailing.
My son believes it’s the end of the world if I’m out of his sight.
Then, when the bathroom door opens I’m met with nothing but smiles and giggles.
Here’s a prime example of the lack of privacy in my life.
I closed the bathroom door just for a little privacy. As I’m on the toilet doing my business, my dear son pushes the door open. (Apparently the door didn’t latch properly).
Me: Hi puddin.’ Can’t mommy just poop by herself?!
Son: (without hesitation) Ooohh Noooo!
He then begins to wrap himself like a mummy in the shower curtain.
It’s at this moment I realize I’ve officially lost all my privacy.
My precious days of showering and peeing by myself are dead.
For years to come I’m faced with the reality that time for myself does not exist when you’re a mom.
Each day, a mother gives up her personal privacy for her children’s happiness.
A lack of privacy for mom’s begins during pregnancy. However, it’s a different type of lack of privacy.
Once you get a certain point in pregnancy, suddenly everyone states an opinion or comment. Worse, yet.
Random strangers think it is appropriate to touch your baby bump without permission.
During my pregnancy I learned the subtle art of the karate chop on strangers who reached for my bump.
Solution For Lack Of Privacy
To get some privacy during bathroom and shower time, I bought a baby gate just for the bathroom door.
My son still chooses to peer through the bar’s to watch me shower.
But, on the plus side I now have time to shower without a little monster constantly taking the shower curtain out of the bathtub.
With a sturdy baby gate just for the bathroom I’m able to still hear (most) everything my child gets into.
It also still provides my son with the security that mommy is still visible and nearby.
No more banging on the bathroom door. I now can take the time I need for myself.
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Body changes come with the territory of birthing tiny humans. With skin stretching to accommodate an ever-growing baby, the stretch marks begin to appear.
Half way through my pregnancy I knew my body was changing forever.
Personally, I wouldn’t trade my stretch marks for the world. They’re my tiger stripes and they’re a thing of beauty.
It took me 2 and 1/2 years to get pregnant. So I’ll keep every stretch mark my body conjures up joyfully.
My stretch marks are a daily reminder that I carried my beautiful boy when my husband and I were told it wasn’t possible to conceive.
While I rejoice for having stretch marks, my loose skin is still here and I gave birth 19 months ago! I have to admit the loose skin has left me a little self-conscious.
Before I got pregnant I didn’t have a six-pack of abs. But my stomach was flat.
After my pregnancy I lost all my baby weight, plus 10 pounds. My lower abdominal still shakes like a bowl of jelly.
Solution For Extra Loose Skin
While there’s always a “mommy makeover tummy tuck,” I feel this is a drastic measure.
To combat my loose tummy skin I’ve invested in a quality workout ball to target my stomach area.
The workout ball is a dream for me because it allows me to focus on toning my loose skin without being on the living room floor.
Although my son may hit the workout ball while in use… I no longer have a toddler crawling all over me adding 30 pounds to my sit up routine.
A Clean House
Once you add kids to your family, you no longer have a clean house. I use to be able to clean every day.
The dishes weren’t piled in the sink. The countertops were always sterilized and wiped down each evening.
The floor was always vacuumed.
Basically I was a neat freak.
Since adding a baby to our little family, my housekeeping skills have significantly gone downhill.
That’s because I simply don’t have the time to be obsessed about a clean house.
I’m too busy taking care of my son or working on this blog!
Dishes will now sit piled in the sink because during hectic days I don’t have the time to stand over the sink and hand wash them.
Cherrios, toddler Chex Mix and graham crackers are now strewn all over the carpet on a daily basis.
And the snacks stay there awhile.
I’m not a lazy mom, just a smart mom. My son will drop his snacks on the carpet (on purpose), then eat them off the floor.
Why should I make the housework harder by breaking out the vacuum with every dropped cheerio.
I’ve just accepted that my house is not going to be spotless and orderly like it was before children.
Yes, I’d love it if my house didn’t look like a tornado of toys, clothes and snacks blew through by 8 am.
But guess what?
Eventually, my son will grow older and move out of the house and I’ll be wishing his toys were still cluttering up the house.
Because of this, I’ve learned to sacrifice a clean house for the happiness of my son.
Yes, I still clean. But I don’t obsess over a clean house like I once did.
Solution For A Clean House
My strategic plan to keeping a (semi) clean house is using a rotating toy system.
With a two bedroom, one bathroom house, we don’t have much extra space to spare. But I use toy storage bins to maximize space.
Every two to three days I rotate toy bins. I feel this system increases my son’s playfulness because he easily forgets about all the awesome toys he has!
So every toy bin feels like he’s getting new toys to play with.
Another life saver I use to keep my house clean is a hands-free spot deep cleaner.
Every time my son or dog pukes on the floor, I break out the deep cleaner, place it over the stain and walk away.
I literally don’t do any scrubbing! Yes, this is a lazy mom hack and I’m all for it!
Some days I feel like motherhood is dragging me behind a speeding car.
Other days I feel like ripping my hair out. Some nights, I cry myself to sleep because it’s just been that bad of a day.
While it might seem sad that I break down and have a good cry now and then… That’s the reality of being a mom.
As a mom I sacrifice a level head. I trade in my sanity most days.
From my toddler having one too many tantrums to never getting any alone time, I feel like I’m the one who needs a time-out!
Yesterday, my mom, my son and I went out to lunch at a restaurant. Not anything fancy just a quick meal of burgers and fries.
As we’re standing at the counter ordering, my son pukes on me.
It was a small enough amount I was able to catch it in my hand. But as I excused ourselves to the bathroom to get cleaned up…
He starts epically puking all the way to the bathroom. As I run to the bathroom carrying my puking toddler we leave behind a trail of puke on the restaurant floor!
Puke is flowing out of my child like he’s been possessed. Once in the bathroom I realized my shirt, bra and shorts were permeated with puke.
My poor son was soaked with puke chunks all over his shirt, shorts and sandals.
Realizing I forgot a change of clothes for my son and I, I feel my sanity slowly start to slip away.
I wasn’t mad at my son by any means. Just slightly embarrassed and honestly, exhausted.
I cleaned us up the best I could and also cleaned the restaurant floor because I felt that bad.
Needless to say, we got our food to go.
Once home I stripped off our puked soaked clothes, redressed, ate our meal and decided this momma needed a mental break!
Every mother needs a mommy recharge moment! You deserve it!
After being puked on so much, I did too!
Solution For Regaining Sanity
Easy! Find something you love to do. Don’t do any housework!
Set your kids up with a fun activity they can do by themselves.
Throw on the Paw Patrol and find some space for yourself. Then recharge and gain some sanity back.
I’ve started to designate a block of time dedicated to alone playtime.
This is only possible with toys that keep him engaged! Toys like an animal farm set foster imaginative play.
My son is also really into Mega Bloks.
While they are great for building, my son’s mostly in destruction mode with them.
I know after he gets done Mega Bloks will be EVERYWHERE!
But it’s worth it to get time to myself!
I use this time to myself to regain sanity with reading. Reading for me is an escape from reality.
Which is exactly what you need! I bought a Kindle just to have instant access to books at my fingertips. No trips to the book store!
My kindle allows me to regain my sanity and gives my mind a break from motherhood.
Even if I can only read for 20 minutes. It’s still enough time to calm down, regain some energy and my lost sanity.
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A Sex Life
Since having my son, sex with my husband doesn’t happen as often. We still have romantic moments.
But those moments are hard to come by.
Once a child enters your life, your sex life with your spouse tends to suffer a bit.
To be honest, I feel like this is mostly my fault. Since I am a stay-at-home mom, I take care of our son constantly, all day every day.
By night fall, I’m exhausted. Sometimes the last thing I want to do is make love. It’s simply because I’m dead tired.
And I know our son will eventually wake up in the middle of the night at some point.
So I need to get all the sleep I can, when I can get it.
If you’re like me and your sex life has taken a nose-dive after children, don’t worry it is normal.
Everyone experiences less sex after children. That’s because children take up a lot of your time.
Solution For A Better Sex Life
Well, you and your spouse have to make both romance and sex a priority. Your sex life with your husband is just as important as your own self-care routine.
Without sex, you could be missing that special connection with your husband.
Sex is good for both your mental and physical health.
The best solution for revamping your sex life is to date each other. Go to the movies. Eat at a restaurant (without your kids).
Better yet, have your kids spend the night with grandparents.
That way your spouse and you can focus on reconnecting with each other, without distractions.
Since becoming a mother, I’ve sacrificed and gave up a lot for my child.
Tests my sanity…
Steals my privacy…
Destroys my house…
Changed my body appearance…
And reduced my sex life with my husband…
But eventually you will regain all these sacrifices back when your children grow up.
While being a mom requires you to give up a lot of things in your life, you do get paid in hugs and kisses.
Your children will look back on their childhood years and will appreciate the things you gave up for their happiness.
What things have you as a mother sacrificed in your life to make your children happy?
Big or small sacrifices, comment below and let’s get a conversation going!
Monday 2nd of July 2018
Yes, I don't know why but spending time with my husband is always last now. We've tried different tactics. I also thought about writing a post about time with your husband being the same as self-care. All of these things are 100% truth
Friday 6th of July 2018
I feel my husband comes last as well. I do feel bad about that, but we're working on improving it by trying to spend more quality time together. I completely think that alone time with your spouse is a form of self-care. Being a mother is exhausting work and I don't always have the energy to be with my husband as I once did. But I'm so glad you commented! It's good to know I'm not the only one!
Jacquie | Seeking Simple Life
Monday 2nd of July 2018
I have lived this list. The baby gate is pretty genius! FYI I L.O.V.E my Kindle too!
Friday 6th of July 2018
Since becoming a mother, I have invented a lot of parenting hacks to make my life just a little easier. Thanks for stopping by and commenting! I'm glad you enjoyed the article!