If you’re a stay at home mom, it is one of the most rewarding jobs in the world. No you don’t get paid for it, but you work just as hard as anyone else out there in the workforce.
While it’s rewarding being paid with hugs and kiss, being a stay at home mom is hard. There’s days where your children drive you to the brink of insanity.
With the same routine, tantrums, errands, sleep deprivation, it’s no wonder mothers can feel as if they’re losing their sanity.
Slowly overtime, you may even feel as if your losing your identity in motherhood.
Thankfully, you are not alone! Many stay at home moms struggle with keeping their sanity and raising children. But there are ways to regain your sanity as a stay at home mom!
Here’s 9 ways to keep from losing your sanity in motherhood!
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1. Leave The House
As a stay at home mom, leaving the house is challenging. I still struggle with this one. That’s why it’s at the top of my list for regaining my sanity in motherhood.
Now that you can practically get everything you want delivered to your home, there’s really no reason to leave for small shopping errands.
But, even if you and your children need to swing by the store to get more milk… Do it! Leaving the house once in a while is essential to maintaining your sanity.
Every time you leave your home, you see that there’s life beyond your children and your home!
I am a homebody by nature. I do like to stay at home, instead of going out. But when I’ve been trapped in the house for too long, I almost become a little claustrophobic.
It’s nice to be comfortable enough to want to stay home all the time. But both you and your children need a change in scenery!
Go to the park. Shop till you drop. Grab your stroller and take the kids for a walk. Anything you need to do to get away from your house for a while.
2. Take A Break From Work
Whether you’re a work from home momma or your work is your children and your home, take a break.
Often with children and work, our lives are going so fast we simply need to slow down. There’s nothing wrong with sitting down and watching your favorite show (as long as it’s kid friendly).
I think as a stay at home mom or a working stay at home mom we think we need to constantly be doing something. In all reality, stay at home moms do so much for their family… All the time!
If you work from home… Schedule small breaks throughout your day to take a break away from work.
If you’re a stay at home mom… Stop doing the laundry, dishes and millions of other things around the house! Curl up on the couch during kids nap times and watch your favorite movie!
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3. Find Activities For Your Kids To Play With Alone
Have you every had one of those days where your children are driving you crazy?
As a stay at home mom, I have many days like that. There’s days where my son is grumpy, not listening and throwing way too many tantrums. These are the type of days where you need to devise a plan of action when it comes to activities.
Choose a fun activity for your children to play independently without you!
I recently bought an indoor plastic Little Tikes slide for my 2-year-old. Yes, I still have to watch him carefully so he doesn’t stand at the top of the slide. But he can go up and down the slide without me having to participate.
4. Stop Feeling Guilty For A Messy House
Before kids, my house was spotless. As my son grows older, the messier the house seems to get. It’s mainly because of toys. I put them away, but within two seconds they’re dumped all over the floor again (before I can vacuum).
That’s just life with kids.
Children are messy! Anyone who comes over to your house should expect your house not to be picture perfect. Besides visitors are coming over to see your family, not your house.
As a stay at home mom, there’s always this societal expectation that our house needs to be spotless because we’re home all day. It couldn’t be further from the truth.
We have other responsibilities to take care of. Mainly our children. Our children come first before household chores.
There’s days when I get a million things done around the house. Then other days I can’t even run a vacuum across the floor.
The one thing I am guilty of is feeling bad about the house not being clean by the time my husband gets home. I actually still apologize for the house being messy.
Of course my husband always tells me “Stop apologizing. If you didn’t get to it, you didn’t get to it.” He’s easy to please.
My point is I need to stop feeling so guilty for the house not being spotless all the time. And you shouldn’t feel guilty either!
Let it go!
5. Have A Dance Party
When’s the last time you went dancing? Maybe at a club before you had kids?
There’s no better way to lift a bout of sadness in you and your children then having a dance party.
If you’re stressed out… Your children will know it. Then it will feel as if they’re pushing all your buttons just to make things worse for you.
It’s at that point that your whole family needs to take a break and relieve some stress. So throw on your favorite (kid-friendly) music and start dancing with your kids.
For my son and I, we have a playlist of awesome Disney songs set up on my YouTube to dance to. Last week, we danced to a half hour of Sesame Street songs on YouTube Kids.
So forget about everything else and regain your sanity by dancing like only your kids are watching!
6. Reclaim Your Identity
Do you feel being a stay at home mom has caused you to lose your identity? Maybe you no longer participate in hobbies you once loved. Your life probably feels like a never-ending wheel of diaper changes, laundry and sleepless nights.
While mothering young children doesn’t last forever, your needs and aspirations in life are still important. Start today by finding ways to reclaim your identity.
The truth is… You are more than just a mother! Find time for your own needs and wants. For instance, restart your favorite hobbies you once loved. Lose yourself in a good book before you fall asleep.
When I was a new mom, it took me almost a year to figure this sanity saving tip out. I felt I had to be doing everything all the time for my son. There was no me time. I’m not talking just self-care either. I’m talking about enjoying the things you once loved.
One of the best things I do to reclaim my identity is I color my hair. I dye my own hair at home because I honestly like to do it. Every four weeks I find time in my schedule to do my own hair salon session.
After I’ve covered my roots and look in the mirror… I immediately feel a rush of confidence in myself I hadn’t felt for weeks. No, I don’t need to dye my hair a different color. But it helps me feel more like myself and gives me the confidence boost I need.
7. Take A Shower
This tip seems simple enough right? Well there’s only so many days you can dry shampoo your hair.
Trust me, I’ve been there!
Between doctors appointments, diaper changes, feedings and more it’s hard to find even a five-minute block of time to take a shower. Pretty soon you can only rock the greasy mom bun for so long.
Showing or bathing is a basic human necessity.
While your children are running around clean, happy and healthy, you haven’t pampered yourself with a hot shower for two or more days.
Find the time to take care of this basic necessity. Taking a shower will give you relaxation and a sanity break from your children (even it if is only five minutes long).
8. Play With Your Children
If your child is not of school age yet… Then you are your child’s favorite playmate! With as busy as a stay at home mom schedule can get at times, it’s important to still devote time to a simple act… Playing!
Moms can play too!
So forget about the piles of laundry and the mounds of toys everywhere and set aside some time to interact with your little one.
While my son loves to wrestle with daddy, this pregnant momma doesn’t wrestle anymore. But I still set aside blocks of time throughout the day to play with my son.
For instance, between 11 and 11:30 am we do a little preschool lesson. He’s only two, but I like to get a jump on things. I use a preschool activity book that focuses on things like colors, shapes, and letters.
9. Talk To Others
Being a stay at home mom is truly isolating at times. Everything revolves around your children and your home. Before long you realize the amount of people you still communicate with is dwindling.
Honestly, I don’t have any mom friends. And it’s sad. As stay at home moms we’re in our own little worlds with our families. It’s hard to get away from the kids to have a girls night. For an introvert like me, it’s even harder.
Although I’m an introvert by nature, the best way to still communicate with others is to text. I’m amazing at how isolated I feel at times, but then I text someone to start a conversation and I suddenly feel less alone.
It’s weird how you have children that are dependent upon you every need and yet still feel so alone at times…
Reaching out and communicating with others people who are not children is a huge sanity saver for a stay at home mom!
I implore you to reconnect with the outside world. Especially if you’re feeling alone, depressed or feel as if your losing yourself in motherhood. There’s other mom’s going through the exact same thing! Even reaching out on social media is a great way to connect with other people.
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Motherhood is never easy. I don’t think it’s ever been easy since the beginning of time. But being a stay at home mom doesn’t last forever.
It may seem like a revolving door of the same routine every day. But eventually, your children will grow up and won’t need you as much.
Although motherhood is the most awarding job in the world… At times it’s also the most demanding, isolating and stir-crazy job. There are times when I feel as if my sanity is barely holding on. When it get’s to that point, I know I’m beyond stressed and all I want to do is break down and cry.
Before you get to this point in motherhood, try to follow some of these nine tips to help you stay sane in the midst of chaos.
Schedule time to take care of yourself both physically and mentally. Your children need a well and whole you! The better you take care of yourself by remembering who you are (besides a mother), the better you will take care of your children.